Rumor Has It…

Today I played the part of  a gossiping tour guide on our “Trash Tour” bus outing.  We invited residents from my senior community to enjoy a tour of our town complete with pit stops for snacks (such as pork rinds, rag bologna and squeeze cheese, moon pies and grape sodas).

During our tour we would stop in front of each MacMansion and I would put on my trashiest Southern drawl to dish dirt on the fictitious person who lived there.

“Now on my little ol’ right,  you’ll see the home of Big Daddy Graystone.  He isn’t home right now though.  A little ol’ burdie called me this mawnin’ and said they saw Big Daddy creepin’ in the backdoor of that TRASHY Nancy Miller.  Y’all know her don’cha, Hon? The owner of the Germantown Bakery?  Rumor has it that there is more than buns in her oven!!!”

Oh how they would squeal!  After all, polite society ladies never speak of such things!

We went through the gamut of stories; there was the 2nd floor balcony of Freddy the Flasher, the tall spindly Victorian of old lady Boone with her 29 cats, the countryside compound of a real live hit-man, and the modern Californian+

type estate of Maylene Porter, who has more visits from the May Tag repairman than Sear & Roebucks!  The stories got better as the tour went along.

When the tour finally ended, we collected the remains of some mighty delicious delicacies, and gave everyone a hug promising to do this tour again soon.  As I bent down in my seat to collect my purse, I overheard one of the passengers say to the other…” Who was that woman and how does she know EVERYBODY in town?”

The smartly styled gray headed  tourist leaned over to whisper in her companion’s ear…

“Rumor has it…”

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Wyncies Woolery

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Named for the lovely lane in England where my husband’s grandmother lived.  “The Wyncies'”  thatched roof cottages and winding country lanes stole my heart and began my obsession with all things sheepy!

My little flock include Old English Southdown Baby Dolls and Shetlands, who boast names like Agnes, Andrew and Penelope. Both breeds are miniature in stature, but surely make up for it in personality!

Of course, I will be blogging now and then about my escapades with wool, but today my post is about making woolen dreadlocks.

I know, I know, unusual you say. Well, not really. Just unusual in MY world until now.  I have been having so much creative fun with this.  Just Google woolen dreads and you will see the most amazing works of art. They are dyed awesome colors and adorned with beads, fabrics and beautiful jewelry… All of which is right up my ally.

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It is a lengthy process if you start by shearing your own sheep.

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Then the fleece is sent to a fiber mill…which takes six weeks and eventually it returns to me like this!

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then comes the fun part of making them into dreads.

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and dying them.

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And then you get to wear them!!!

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Hahaha! You guys should never let me stay home by myself!

 

 

 

 

Figuring Out My New Life

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I had given a lot of thought about what I didn’t  like in my old life, but I hadn’t given much thought about what I would like in my new one. So, I made a list of what I thought an average day would look like, and with list in hand, I set off to try it out today .

7:00 a.m Wake up, drink Bulletproof coffee, do my Posture challenge exercises, drink more coffee.  No rushing, no cursing, no worrying about what to wear.  

8:00 a.m Listened to motivational speaker on You Tube, checked out competition and took notes.  No watching the news and getting depressed about the world.

8 :30 Threw in laundry, make bed, putz’d around.  Not mandatory  just a little housekeeping.

9:00 Took Sheltie (Maisie Moonbeam) for a walk on our country road, cut wild flowers and  took some pics.  No one hour commute.  No exercising in the gym. Loved the fresh air.

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10:00 Made flower arrangement, fed farm animals, showered.  No time clock or morning meetings.

11:00 Blogged, answered emails, wrote chapter on book while eating low carb brunch.  No, industrial coffee in Styrofoam cup.

12:00 Got dressed up and drove to work until 4:00 pm.  Still light outside when driving home.

So far so good. I could live with that.  Now I gotta figure out how to make that happen every day.  Ya know, I don’t mind going to work outside of my home.  I’ve stayed home all day with the kids, and all I wanted to do was go out!!!  Now I work from morning until night getting up at 5:00 a.m. and all I want to do is go home.  I’m looking for something in the middle!  Hey, it could happen, and I’m going to figure it out!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WMZK3AFyto&t=337s

Check out one of my first Red Shoe Life appearances at the Women’s Expo!  My kids were at the show and said “Mom! Those people kept talking when you were talking!”

I said, “Hell, you guys have been doing that for years!”

 

Moo For a New You!

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It seems like I will go to any lengths to provide comedic relief for my more serious posts.  I have been wanting to talk about Collagen for a while now, but it is so damn boring, I just had to spice it up.  So, some of you know that I live in a rural area and these lovely ladies live next door.  They are fun to “moo” to, have great cow pies for my garden and I can set my clock by their nightly return to their barn.

Well, on my walk over the weekend, I got the brilliant idea that I should take a picture and post it with my info. about Collagen.  Apparently they have been reading my BLOG, because then THIS HAPPENED…

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and the only thing between me and this guy was those two little strings of barbwire.  Needless to say,  my lovely walk turned into a speedy exit and I promised that if they spared my life, I wouldn’t mention that the best source of Collagen is bovine!

Ok, so Collagen, I thought it was just an ingredient for wrinkles in face cream.  Apparently, I was only hitting the surface and didn’t know the big picture.  I’m going to simplify our chat and if you have more questions, please GOOGLE it, because there is really a lot of evidence with scientific explanations…. and uh… just look it up.

I have explained in previous posts, my frustration with doctors when you have to go around in circles to get information.  When there is something as great as Collagen, why don’t they just freakin’ tell people?  So, it turns out that Collagen is really good for your joints.  It is recommended for Rheumatoid Arthritis as well as all kinds of arthritis and other joint issues.  It improves everything from circulation to recovery from athletics.  You can think of Collagen as a type of elastic that holds us together and comes from the Greek word meaning “glue”  It holds up our falling faces, reduces the look of cellulite, reduces inflammation, heals your leaky gut, builds strong bones, tightens loose skin from weight loss, speeds wound healing, and everything else from dental to healthy hair.

I mentioned that there is Collagen in some skin creams, but for real benefits, you have to start on the inside.  There are tablets and powders and even bone broth that can be made by buying grass fed beef bones from Whole Foods and stewing them in a crock pot to make a wonderful soup.  Go to Wellnessmama.com for a great recipe.  Bone broth can be also made with organic chicken bones, pork bones or even fish. With that said, I just don’t want to mess with it and I went for Collagen supplements.

I have been trying out a Collagen powder that I  put into my bullet proof coffee in the morning and off I go.  It has no taste, but it does have a few carbs.  It is made by Zint and I ordered it from Amazon.

Check it out, try it out.  I think it is really helping me.  I just wish someone had told me about Collagen years ago.  Yeah, I still put that crap on my face, but since beauty is only skin deep, I’m going for the good stuff…. not just good.. it’s “Moo-velous!”

Happy Labor Day?

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Happy Labor Day??? Aside from some bodacious BBQ action that I have in store for today, I’m not so sure I want to go so far as to celebrate work!  In fact, I think it should be renamed, No-Labor Day!

My 2 mile walk yesterday has me feelin’ fortified, and as this is the last day to put a beat down on my “Woman vs Wild” home improvement projects, I better get crack-a-lackin’.

Last week’s joyous jubilee of the reincarnation of my swimming pool was tragically short lived.  After the sixth pool company took their turn (and more of my money), I awoke to a pool whose 30 foot liner looked as flat as the celebratory balloons.  OMG I am so $%^$$## sick of this freakin’ pool and the people who keep declaring it fixed.

So, with outdoor chores hot on the list, the renovation projects will be set aside until this afternoon when the REAL LABOR will begin.  Today’s project involves the jungle in my sun-room.   Stay tuned for some updated photos of me, my machete and my collection of plants.

Until next time, enjoy this holiday and I’ll be back this week with some new recipes, updates on my 30 day Posture Challenge and some pics of me, my shotgun and the pool men. 🙂

Deb

 

Junk in the Trunk

Ok guys, last Spring I was visiting a car dealership when I got a glimpse of myself in a large mirror. I honestly thought I had been looking better, but OMG how humbling! Not only did I see too much junk in my trunk, but by the looks of things,  it looked like a whole set of luggage!  Suddenly I wanted a complete overhaul, and I have spent the last six months trying to turn my Samsonite into a tiny Coach clutch.  Ok, who was I kidding, it wasn’t just the trunk… my whole damn car was a wreck.

Weeks and weeks of high octane fuel has put me on the right road, but with only half of my trip complete, I started to see a small problem with my chassie.  I was turning into a more compact model , for sure,  but I’m still not looking like the beauties on the showroom floor.

One of the things I noticed in most of my pictures, is that I definitely need an alignment!  I have been blaming everything from bad springs to years of wear and tear for my dumpy rear end and sagging headlights, but the truth is, if I would just straighten my wheels, I’d have more bump in my bumpers!

What the hell is she talking about????  I’m talking about, no matter how much weight I’ve been losing, I still look frumpy because I have terrible posture!!!  I look at pictures and I wonder why the hell don’t I just stand UP!!!

So, for the next 30 days, I am taking a posture challenge from a You Tube Queen called the Posture Coach.  Check her out!  She will fix your Dowager’s Hump, your protruding posterior and even put more tread on your tires!  You know you spend too much time in the Rest Stop and not enough time drivin’.  Join me on September 1st for a 30 day Posture Challenge and get all that junk out of your trunk and into your roof rack!

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